I`ve been starting this letter over and over again, but I always seem to spread what ever was my starting idea to wondering around and remembering all those beautiful moments we had together. One of the reasons for that kind of diffusion is my labyrinth like mind that simply works that way. The other is level of assignment its self as I'm trying to describe, both to you and me, the way you influenced my life.
Different culture background had made us equally strange to each other and therefore getting to know other way of life seemed as precious and exiting experience... I still find hard to believe that out there exists, as pure as it can be, a whole world filled whit people of strong faith and uncorrupted habits, that tends to look further then its own backyard and spreads its kindness as far as it can reach. Even harder for my understending is the way you listened to the whispers that cracked out of my world. Openly. Positively. No judgement. Eager to learn and teach...
I am aware of the fact that you are unique individual, and that what i believe your world is, represent just an immpresion that grew under light of your personallity, and yet...
We agreed that each one of us has that empty space that often screams for presence of higher love and understanding than our loved ones can give. Human nature finds difficualt to fit in emotions and happenings and therefore we feel straggled, helpless and unsecure once we lose control over our lives. In order to keep our sanity we need something thats stronger and more important than what our reality seems to be. Its Faiths job to fill that need.
Therefore, meeting you had left such an impression. Everything about you seemed so unreal and novel like, except the fact that you are real! It helped me to step out of that bittered lethargic world and discover just how much I don't know and want to learn. I still remember and quote things you said in our long conversationes (and I don't think about the "burning and inhaling" one:))...
And above all, you made me realize just how much more life is than I planed it to be, or have been told it can be. Therefore I'm determined not to let it slip trough my finger while I'm pretending to be occupied by "more important and urgent matter".
Doing all little things for me, that you have, you've done greater one than you'll ever know. You helped me to regain my faith in people and greater cause that put us here. I'm afraid I cant offer in return nothing but my loyal friendship and occasional prayer for your health and happiness, but knowing me as you have come to, I'm sure you understand thats the greatest gift I have to offer, and the hardest one to earn.
I'm closeting this letter with hope that I will see you soon and promise Ill have Faith in it stronger and longer than ever before.
Much love,
N.